


Breathe

by cheeseburgersmakemeveryhappy



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alpha Dean, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Bottom Castiel, Castiel in Heat, Castiel is Claire Novak's Father, Dean Winchester is Claire's father, Demons, Domestic Castiel/Dean Winchester, Grief/Mourning, Hunter Dean, Hunter Sam, M/M, Men of Letters Bunker, Minor Character Death, Omega Castiel, Porn, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Smut, Top Dean Winchester
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-28
Updated: 2016-02-29
Packaged: 2018-05-23 20:33:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 12,749
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6129181
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cheeseburgersmakemeveryhappy/pseuds/cheeseburgersmakemeveryhappy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mating bonds are "Til Death Do Us Part" affairs. That's why Dean can't mate Cas when the Omega gets pregnant with Dean's pup. See, Dean is a hunter and if he dies on a hunt, Cas dies too. So Dean steps aside, and Cas finds Michael. He's a loving husband and step-father who accepts that Dean and Sam are a part of Claire and Cas' lives. When Michael's life is lost, Dean steps up, taking over the mating bond that should have been his years ago and helping Cas with the pain and grief of losing his mate.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I feel so Stephenie Meyer. I am half-way through two other fics but had this dream (specifically Chapter 3) and just had to get it down. And then this happened, and it became an (I think) beautiful and poignant and not angsty per se but tender story about processing grief and second chances. I hope you like it.

_“Pops, it’s Claire. Something’s wrong with Michael. He’s changed. Really, he’s been acting weird for a while but I just now started putting things together. And, Pops, I think he’s hurting Dad.”_

Dean listens to his daughter’s message twice more before calling Cas. It’s probably nothing because Michael is the closest thing to “Mr. Rogers” Dean has ever known. Shit, Sam completed an extensive background check on the guy back when Cas first started dating him because no one shady was getting within 50 feet of Sam’s niece. And seriously, Alpha or not, the idea of Michael hurting Dean’s ex is about as realistic as finding intelligent life on Mars.

Claire’s probably just feeling a little lonely at college and is kicking the drama up a couple of notches to get Dean’s attention. But then again Dean considers as he stares at his phone, she’s grown up with Michael as her stepfather for most of her life; if she’s concerned, he should be as well. He dials the number but it goes straight to voicemail so he leaves a message.

_“Cas, hey, it’s Dean. I know it’s been a while and I’m sorry about that. I, uh, just wanted to check in. You know, make sure you’re okay. Claire, um, seems a little worried about you. Give me a call, okay?”_

_\------------------------------------------_

**_1997_ **

The record store in the mall is just a little mom and pop shop. There are a few rows of LPs but it’s mostly CDs now, a fact that grates on Dean’s nerves. Sammy’s on student council at the high school and “I Believe I Can Fly” by R. Kelly is the theme song for prom, so they’re on a mission to find it. They walk in and Sam heads straight back to the CDs, head down and intent on locating this thing. Dean’s just the designated driver. He looks around, glancing at the guy behind the register who looks up from a monstrosity of a textbook to make eye contact and flash a quick smile.

“Let me know if you guys need help finding anything,” he offers before ducking back into _The History of Life from the First Ameba to Present_ or _The Collected Works of Every Author Ever_.

God, the size of that book is something Dean will never forget. Same with that kid’s eyes – the bluest blue – and his messy dark hair. He’s tall with a slight build but toned biceps peek out from below the sleeves of his Pearl Jam t-shirt.

“Jesus, that’s got to be the biggest textbook I’ve ever seen. What the hell are you studying?”

The guy looks up, a little surprised, and then glances back down at the book like he’s not sure either. “Shakespeare,” he answers with a smile. His voice is surprisingly deep.

Dean notices his name badge. “Where do you go, uh, Cam?”

The smile turns to a smirk. “It’s Cas, and KCK Community. You go there as well?”

“Nope. I travel the world and babysit punk-ass baby brothers,” Dean replies, turning around to spot Sam with a CD under his arm, its white plastic anti-theft collar sticking out a good foot behind him as he thumbs through another stack of titles.

“As a punk-ass baby brother, I commend you,” Cas laughs. He looks Dean up and down and Dean wonders if Cas is the guy at the carnival who can accurately guess your height, weight and age.

“Yeah? How many cooler older siblings you got?” Dean asks, leaning against the counter.

“I have one cooler older sibling and three other pathetic older siblings,” Cas shoots back. Dean notes that the smirk is back and Cas does this thing where he crosses his arms in front of his chest and cocks his head to the side.

Dean grins at Cas, who’s grinning at him. He’s got some serious butterflies in his gut and this guy smells fucking fantastic, but after what could easily have been two years Cas breaks the staring contest first with a shrug and looks back down at his book.

Dean realizes he was just Creepy Stalker Dude. “Uh, yeah,” he says. “Wait, you’re the youngest of five? No wonder you’re so thin. You must get like two crackers and carcass pickings for dinner.”

Cas snorts into his book without looking up and Dean thinks it’s probably the cutest sound he’s heard in months. He’s wondering why he thinks some dude’s snort/laugh is cute when Sam joins them.

“Find what you were looking for?” Cas looks up again and asks.

“Yup,” Sam replies, placing two CDs on the counter.

“R. Kelly,” Cas comments. “Good for the proverbial slow dance. Nice choice. And Goo Goo Dolls?” He gives Sam a sly smile. “Very eclectic choices, young sir.”

 

Sam nods, all serious now that he’s surrounded by his music. Cas rings him up and Sam pays the man with what Dean knows is lawn mowing money. Next year when Sam’s 17, he’ll be working at the DQ and pulling in some real dough, but for now lawns are keeping his little brother flush.

As they head out, Dean can feel Cas’ eyes on him.

It’s three weeks and as many trips to the mall later before Dean gets up the cojones to ask Cas if he’d like to hang out sometime. They spend a month walking the mall on Cas’ breaks before Cas invites Dean over to his place, a two-bedroom apartment that houses four starving students, and the five of them play Trivial Pursuit until 1:00 am. They’re standing by Dean’s car, Cas hugging himself to keep the cool temps at bay, when Dean’s mouth goes on autopilot. “Cas, man, what the hell cologne do you wear because it smells awesome.”

Cas laughs out loud at that one before he leans in and Dean goes ramrod straight as Cas’ breath tickles his ear. “Dean, it’s Eau de Omega.”

They look at each other some more, Dean’s face full of questions he doesn’t even know how to ask, before Cas finally cuts him some slack. “You’re an Alpha. I’m an Omega. Do the math and that equals I smell like whatever’s been starring in your wet dreams.”

Dean’s shocked. “I’m not into dudes, Cas.”

“Mmhmm,” Cas says, nodding his head in what is definitely not agreement. “You want to hang out again tomorrow? Charlie’s got a Playstation.”

“Sure,” Dean replies.

It takes Dean 17 days exactly to kiss Cas in the front seat of the Impala. Cas’ hands are warm and strong, and they hold Dean’s head steady as Cas licks his way into Dean’s mouth and Dean moans his way into Cas’. “You’re adorable, Dean,” Cas chuckles in that low voice that sends Dean’s stomach into knots. Dean’s having a goddamn epiphany right now and Cas thinks he’s adorable? He doesn’t know if he should be insulted or embarrassed. His cheeks turn red and the decision is made.

Over the course of that semester, Cas passes English Lit with a B and Dean gets his first blowjob from a guy. Well, not “a” guy – the only guy that Dean gives a rat’s ass about other than Sam. Cas shows Dean what a real hand job should feel like, with both of them sliding against each other into the tunnel of their laced fingers. When Cas moves Dean’s other hand to his ass and Dean immediately squeezes and kneads the firm muscles with calloused fingers, Cas shoots off between them with a moan. He’s completely dazed and smiling like an idiot when he leans over and sucks on Dean’s earlobe. “Show me, Alpha,” he growls into Dean’s ear and Dean comes on the spot, shocked like Cas just performed some amazing magic trick.

By the end of Cas’ first year at KCKCC, Dean knows where to buy little foil packets of lube and he and Cas have actual sex for the first time. Stars are twinkling in the summer sky but the air between them in Baby’s back seat is humid with heated breaths and sweat. Cas shows Dean how to crook a finger and find that small place that lights Cas up until he’s gasping and his body shakes while Dean gapes at Cas like he knows the secrets of the universe. When Cas eases himself down on Dean’s huge Alpha dick (seriously, Dean, you must know how big that thing is, right?), panting because there’s no room for anything else in his body, not even air for his lungs, Dean squeezes his eyes shut and tries not to think too much about how incredibly overwhelming it is to be completely surrounded by Cas.

Cas leans into the back of the front seat, straddling Dean’s lap as Dean holds onto his boyfriend’s hips and slowly fucks up into him. Their combined arousal scents fill the car until Dean’s pretty sure he’s got a serious buzz going. Cas is moaning and jacking himself off in Dean’s lap and Dean is pretty sure that he could die right now a very happy man. Well maybe not right now, but _wait, wait, oh shit, fuck Cas, yes!_ **Now**. He could die right now and the coroner wouldn’t have to think too hard about why there’s such a huge grin on Dean’s face.

The fourth time they’re together in the back seat, coincidentally in the same meadow and under the same summer stars, Dean tells Cas that he loves him.

\-----------------------------------------------------

“I tried, honey, but Dad’s not calling me back.”

“Pops, Michael took his phone,” Claire says. “I can’t get through to him either.”


	2. Chapter 2

“Okay so get this,” Sam says, and Dean’s ears perk up. “I found a case. String of suicides, hostile takeovers, and dirty business dealings. They’re all in Dayton.”

“Dayton?” Dean asks. Sam’s nodding his head, both of them instantly thinking of Claire and Cas and the fact that neither Dean nor Sam have been able to get Cas on the phone for over a week now.

“Yeah. Do you want to call him again?”

“I’ve tried, Sam. I can’t get through but I can still reach Claire.”

“At least Michael hasn’t turned off her phone. I’ll do some more digging, but we’re probably going to have to put boots on the ground.”

 _Fuck_. “We need to go anyway,” Dean says. “Make sure they’re alright.”

_\----------------------------_

**_1998_ **

Dean can barely contain himself after that hunt in Ojai. It takes two days longer than he planned and by the time he and his dad make it back home to Lawrence, Dean’s about 18 hours late for Cas’ heat. That means his boyfriend is basically feverish, wracked with painful seizures, sporting a hard-on that could pound nails and desperate for Dean. The note Cas left with Sam says it all: “Rodeo Inn, Room 103, need condoms and granola bars.” Dean calls in sick for the week and tells Sammy where he is in case of an emergency but to _call_ for God’s sake before coming anywhere close. They hole up in that cheap motel on the outside of town and play house, screwing hard through Cas’ insatiable need with the TV on in the background, sleeping for a couple of hours at a time in a tangle of legs, and eating hot dogs and ramen noodles. When it’s done the little room smells so much like sex and heat and _them_ that Dean steals a pillowcase and takes it home.

They’re at Cas’ apartment five weeks later and it’s the night before Dean has to leave for a hunt in Jackson Hole. Cas has been on edge all evening. He finally puts his art history text aside, takes Dean’s hand and tells him that everything’s going to change. He’s pregnant. He begs Dean to mate him, but all Dean can think about is how he’s driving for over 15 hours tomorrow to go up against God-knows-what and he may honestly not make it back. He’s 21 years old. Hunting the big baddies is all Dean knows how to do and he’s fucking good at it. His life has purpose – has meaning – but it’s completely shitty, filled with shitty motels, shitty life-and-death situations and shitty pool hustles to make just enough money to buy shitty fast food.

If they mate and something happens to him, the bond will literally kill Cas. Dean’s eyes are wet and he feels like the worst Alpha in the history of Alphas because he can’t be there for Cas the way Cas needs him.

Sure he’ll be home for a couple of weeks at a time, but then he’ll be off again. It’s no way for a family to live and Cas deserves better. Their kid deserves better. So he swears he will always be there for Cas and the pup, but they need a stable home life and an Alpha who will provide for them. Then Dean goes home and punches a hole in his bedroom door because the thought of anyone else touching Cas makes him want to vomit.

After Claire’s born, Cas moves them to Dayton because it’s just too painful to stay. Besides, unmated Omegas with kids are a little unusual in Lawrence. Dean calls to talk to Claire several times a week just so she won’t forget his voice. He visits whenever he can, usually every three months or so; sometimes it’s for Cas’ heats, sometimes because he’s passing through on another hunt, but usually it’s because Dean needs to see that Cas and his pup are okay. He takes Sam with him when he can and they all go out for dinner or hang out for a few hours until Claire falls asleep on her uncle’s chest while Dean and Cas hold hands on the couch and talk quietly about Cas’ job and Dean’s last hunt. Then Sam goes back to the hotel and Dean stays, making love to Cas in his twin bed until the Omega is panting and moaning into Dean’s shoulder to keep his voice down and not wake the baby.

They fall asleep together but Cas always wakes alone.

When Cas meets Michael, Dean tries to convince himself that he’s happy for them and that this is what he’s always wanted for Cas and Claire, why he never Alpha’d up and mated the only man he’s ever loved in the first place. The phone calls stay constant and Dean and Sam still try to visit every couple of months, but the ache in Dean’s gut when he and his brother leave now is like a hunger that will never be satisfied. He and Sam go to the wedding and make every one of Claire’s birthdays. And Michael’s great. He’s a good provider, stable, loves Cas and loves Claire like his own. The best part is he’s gracious about letting Dean and Sam stay connected to Claire. He understands how important family is to them.

\-----------------------------

Sam looks up as Dean walks into the war room with a sandwich and a beer. “I don’t know how to tell you this,” he says without a preamble, “but I’m pretty sure the shit in Dayton is tied to Michael.” Dean arches a disbelieving eyebrow so Sam continues. “Three months ago, three suicides took place within two weeks. All three were owners of or had controlling interests in prime real estate that Sandover then bought for pennies on the dollar. Caused a huge stink. And then Sandover flipped the buildings and made $2.5 million. Michael paid himself a nice bonus.”

“Michael?” Dean mumbles around his bacon, lettuce and cheese. “Mr. Disneyland?”

“I know,” Sam shakes his head. “Two weeks after that, Deputy District Attorney kills herself. She was spearheading several cases, one against a holding company that I traced back to Sandover. Without her backing, the investigation stopped. Dean, it’s just keeps going.”

“Why hasn’t anyone confronted him?” Dean asks, his eyebrows furrowed together as he gulps down the beer.

“Let’s go find out.”


	3. Chapter 3

As it turns out, it doesn’t take Sam long to piece the money trail together. Sandover is now in the slumlord business, “serendipitously” stumbling into real estate deals when otherwise happy property owners decide to kill themselves. The deals make the company millions and Michael is the representative on every deed. The buildings they’re buying up like Monopoly pieces are filled with low-income tenants who start acting very erratically themselves. Sam and Dean are on a stakeout when they notice what looks like an impromptu AA meeting but turns out to be an all-hands-on-deck demon casting call. These poor fuckers are being bought and their souls are being sold, creating what the brothers can only guess is a full-on demon army.

All the while, Dean holds onto the lifeline that is Claire’s check-in attempts with Cas and Michael, although Dean is starting to hope to God that Michael’s not in when she finally makes contact.

On Day Three they’re both in the Impala eating carne asada burritos when they finally catch a glimpse of Cas’ husband. He’s leaving the Sandover building but stops to talk to another man, a pumped up Alpha from what Dean can tell, and the conversation gets heated. Michael’s flailing his arms, getting right in the other guy’s face. Dean scowls and Sam’s shaking his head because Mr. Disneyland is so _not_ this guy. Then they see it. Michael’s eyes flash solid black and Dean feels like he’s been physically hit. His first thought is Cas. He grabs his phone to text his daughter but spots a missed message from her instead.

_“Pops, it’s me again. I went by the house but my key doesn’t work. Dad didn’t answer the door. Oh and there’s some new guy working security. I don’t like him.”_

\--------------------------------------------

They’re at an Applebee’s eating salads and cheeseburgers when Dean wipes his mouth with a napkin and asks, “What’s the plan, Sam?”

Sam leans into the booth, stretching a long arm across the back of it. “If you want to make sure Cas is safe and have the least amount of collateral damage, I’m going to say we get Michael at home. But we should let Cas in on what’s going down.”

“I can’t get through to him,” Dean complains, his voice starting to show the stress of the situation. It’s been 17 days, but who’s counting. “Claire can’t get through either.”

“If we take Michael out…” Sam starts.

“Hey, it’s not Michael anymore,” Dean growls.

“Yeah, I get that,” Sam replies. He lowers his voice as he continues. “Dean, they’re bonded. We exorcize the demon and it will find another host. We kill it while it’s still in Michael and Cas will…”

“You think I haven’t thought about that?!” Dean huffs, his voice rising and his anger seeping out of his pores. The beta woman in the booth across from them gives her sister a worried look before lowering her head back to her lunch.

Sam offers his brother an open palm to clue him in on the fact that he’s got to stop. “Well, I know this is a long shot,” he admits, “but we could try a bond transfer.”

“What?!” Dean booms, and suddenly four tables around them go silent. He breathes in through his nose and out through his mouth a few times to regain his composure. When he speaks again it’s barely above a whisper. “Jesus, do you know anyone who’s tried a transfer in the last, I don’t know, _decade_?”

“I’m not gonna lie, Dean. It’s gonna be a bitch, particularly if Cas doesn’t know, you know, because he won’t have much time to process it. But he’s gonna have to accept it. And it has to be done within…”

“I know, Sam. I know how it works.”

\-------------------------------------------

 

They plan the hit for Thursday. The first stop is Claire’s dorm room. They get a devil’s trap set up right outside her door under her “I’m Mat” welcome rug. Sam shows her how to salt the threshold and windowsills.

Next they hit the penthouse. The doorman and security guard are both demons, and there’s one more in the hall outside the door. The brothers are quiet, hoping for the element of surprise, but they run out of luck as soon as Sam picks the lock. Cas is tied in a chair and what used to be Michael is over him, eyes black and gloating. It has Cas by the hair, roughly pulling his head to the side and exposing his neck. The demon presses a long, sharp knife to Cas’ throat; small drops of blood already stain the Omega’s shirt collar. The scent of Cas’ panic fills the room and both Sam and Dean growl low, anger flashing in their eyes.

“This isn’t Michael,” Cas grits out and is rewarded with a fierce tug that wrenches his head even further.

The demon laughs in a way Michael never did, hostile and dark. “Took you long enough to figure that out, didn’t it you stupid Omega shit. At first you were the perfect cover, though, _and_ I got to fuck you.” Cas’ shame wafts off of him in sheets and he drops his eyes, unable to keep the tears back. The stench of sulfur seeps into his nose as the demon leans down and licks a stripe up his exposed neck while maintaining steady eye contact with both Winchesters.

Cas’ body shivers in revulsion, his expression moving from fear to anger. He tracks his friends’ movements, asking about Claire with his eyes. Sam tries for a reassuring nod as he circles around his adversary, hugging the walls. Dean is taking the direct approach, slowly walking towards them and the center of the living room.

“You know,” Michael spits out, “after Cas and you two, Claire is next. Then Cas’ brothers and sisters just for good measure.”

Dean’s snarling under his breath at the mention of his baby girl, canines lowering automatically. Cas’ eyes go hard and he stares at Dean with resolve. Knowing that the demon can’t see his face, Cas silently mouths, “Kill it.” Dean exhales sharply and their eyes lock because they both know the ramifications of the request.

And that’s it for the villain’s monologue. Sam is thrown against the wall behind him. Dean makes a run at Michael but ends up on his knees and bowing in front of his ex’s husband. He covertly slides a demon blade from his boot and exchanges a deliberate nod with Sam, who starts chanting in Latin as easily as reciting the Gettysburg Address. The demon roars, his hatred focused on Sam, as Dean catches Cas’ eye before the knife sails across the room and right into its heart. Both Michael and Cas howl in pain as the demon drops to the ground, gurgling on its own blood. Immediately the men are at Cas’ feet, Sam’s working the rope around his arms while Dean gets his legs.

“Cas, we don’t have much time,” Dean explains as he works on a knot.

“Make sure Claire’s safe, Dean,” Cas groans, his deep voice breaking as pain radiates through his chest.

“Hey!” Dean shouts. “Cas, no!”

“We have a plan,” Sam adds finally freeing the top section of rope.

Cas looks from brother to brother and tenses against another spike of pain. “I’m going to die,” he reminds them.

“I’m gonna take the bond,” Dean says.

Cas is incredulous. “What? You never wanted to bond in the first place. You know what might happen…” He stops as his lungs start slowing down, concentrating only on his next breath. His daughter is his only thought as tears slip down his cheeks. He swallows hard and stares into Dean’s eyes.

“Cas, please, just shut up!” Dean grabs Cas, slinging him into a bridal carry and moves as quickly as he can towards the back of the house. “Sam, watch the door!” he shouts over his shoulder.

They’re in the master suite. Cas looks around, his eyes landing on a picture of Claire, Michael and himself in front of Cinderella’s Castle. His breath hitches in his chest. He’s in a lot of pain; he’s just lost his mate and the torture from the bond’s symbiotic sharing of a fatal wound will kill him shortly. The worst part is the body-wracking despair he feels over leaving Claire.

“Cas, please, sweetheart,” Dean whispers, easing Cas onto the grey and maroon comforter. “I am so sorry. I’m sorry for so much, and I’m sorry about Michael, but I need you.” He’s stripping out of his jacket and shirt and it’s ridiculous because there’s no way he can get hard under these circumstances, but his adrenaline is pumping and the clock is ticking. If he can’t get Cas to accept, to say the words every Omega is taught from middle school through college, Cas will die in Dean’s arms within the next 10 minutes. Oh, and they have to consummate. Fucking hell, they have to consummate while Cas is still dying and mourning and it’s horrible.

“Baby, I can’t live in a world where you’re not in it. But don’t do it for me. Claire needs you. Please.” And because he is such a fucking Boy Scout, and he knew it was going to come to this, Dean fishes out the packet of lube he stuffed in his jeans pocket and puts it between his teeth while he’s working on Cas’ belt and trousers. Dean’s searching Cas’ face for any sign of agreement but Cas is not there. He’s retreated back into himself, watching what’s happening like a third-party observer. Maybe he’s in shock though, because Cas’ hands start to feel cold.

“Cas, look at me!” Dean commands urgently around the small foil in his mouth. He’s got Cas naked from the waist down and stepping out of his own pants and then he’s ripping the foil, chanting the prayer. Because that’s what this is – he’s praying that Cas will accept him. Will choose Claire. Will choose life. He can tell he’s losing.

“A’a hash, jurus kep’ o ta me afa. Gorama pe lo fortuna abul,” Dean says out loud. “I’m sorry this is going to hurt, baby. I’m so sorry,” he whispers, shaking his head because he can’t believe he’s about to cause the dying man below him even more pain. He’s got the lube in his palm as he strokes his dick, jerking himself hard because he’s running out of time, then he pushes Cas’ thighs up and he presses in.

Cas screams, jolting back to the present with the new pain that shoots through him. He grabs Dean’s shoulders hard, gasping for air as his body rocks and Dean fucks him. Tears are rolling down Dean’s face and Cas actually thinks _He is so beautiful_ as his heart starts to slow in his chest.

“Ka’a nee guarra te aloff. Se’aw lo oo,” Dean says, and then leans into Cas, breathing hard, his forehead against Cas’ shoulder. “Please baby, don’t leave me,” he begs. “Don’t leave us. Say it, Cas. Accept the bond. Say it.”

Cas blinks. He’s having trouble breathing and he knows the end is almost here, but Dean’s here too; he can feel his first true love hard and hot inside him. Michael is gone, but Cas needs Claire – needs to know she’s safe. “Ro o taj. Ka’a nee guarra ro o taj,” he says, as loud as he can. It’s a whisper against Dean’s neck. The energy pulse through Cas’ body jumpstarts his heart and now it’s pounding in his chest like it should, moving blood to his hands and feet, every extremity. Suddenly he’s hard and throbbing, gasping for air as his lungs come back online.

“Oh thank God!” Dean sobs out in relief. “Love you, Cas,” he whispers, still moving inside the man who is and always will be too good for him. “Hold on.” He cups his hands around the top of Cas’ head, drops his canines and sinks his teeth over the mating bite that Michael placed on Cas’ neck 14 years ago. Cas doesn’t think he can take any more pain but he does, his body seizing against the shock of Dean’s teeth in his shoulder muscle, injecting saliva and creating a new mating bond. Cas’ teeth drop as well and he howls, the call of an Omega being claimed. Dean feels the knot at the base of his cock grow as he pushes against Cas’ body, once, twice, then he shoves in and locks them together. Cas arches off the bed as he comes, shooting white against Dean’s sweaty stomach. Dean howls out his orgasm, announcing his bond to a pack that hasn’t existed in over three centuries, but it’s done as both of their voices ring out through the empty, cold penthouse. Ancient languages, memorized rituals that are used only a handful of times in as many years, but Cas is alive and breathing in Dean’s arms.

They’re both panting as Dean rolls them, bodies joined for at least a little while now, onto their sides. He hikes Cas’ leg up so they’re as comfortable as possible, foreheads resting against each other. Within seconds Cas feels a vaguely familiar electrical charge zing up his spine and settle in the back of his head as the bond changes. Dean tenses and shakes, sucking in air through his nose as his system responds. Now it’s Cas who’s wiping the tears from Dean’s cheek with his thumb and quietly shushing his mate. “Breathe,” he whispers. Dean looks at him with wide eyes and pulls in a labored breath as synapses in his brain form and chemicals release endorphins to block the pain. “Try to relax, Dean,” he soothes. “It will take about 10 more minutes.”

Dean nods and there’s a knock at the door.

“Everything okay in there?” Sam asks.

“Yes, Sam,” Cas responds, his voice hoarse and deep.

“Good. Dean’s okay?”

Cas looks into Dean’s eyes and allows himself the slightest of smiles. Dean nods. “He’s doing well, Sam. The bond is forming. He’ll be…”

“Fine,” Dean finishes. “I’m fine. We’re gonna need a bit.”

“Yup,” Sam answers, slapping the door and walking back down the hall, his footsteps trailing off.

“Are you hurt? I’m sorry, Cas. I’m so…”

“It’s alright, Dean. I’ll be fine.” He aches, quite literally from top to bottom, but he’s breathing. “You saved my life.”

“I was the one who almost killed you. I’m sorry it was Mich…”

“Sh. Please. Not now. I can’t do that right now.”

Dean nods, but gathers Cas as close as he can and holds on tight. Then an explosion goes off in his head, more like a slamming door, making his ears ring, and he’s flooded with sensation. He hears Cas’ heartbeat and he remembers what’s supposed to come next. Mates, high on endorphins and coming down from orgasms that have rocked out of their bodies, should be filled with love and desire, feelings of family and home, as the bond opens the connection that will forever link them together.

Instead they hold each other and ride out the panic and fear, the pain and the overwhelming sense of loss, until all that’s left is the relief that they’re both safe and their daughter is safe and they get to live another day.


	4. Chapter 4

Michael’s death is deemed a home invasion. Claire confirms that her father and uncle were visiting for the weekend and that they went to see the couple for dinner Thursday evening. The party line is that they walked in on the robbery in progress, had been unable to stop Michael’s murder, and that Dean had, in fact, transferred the bond to save Cas’ life. The culprit escaped while Sam and Dean tried in vain to resuscitate Michael and keep Cas from dying as his mate suffered from the fatal wound.

Cas has to settle Michael’s estate before he can put the penthouse up for sale and find a place of his own. Dean’s half-convinced him to come to Kansas. Cas says he’ll consider it but first there’s the packing and the lawyers and the well-meaning family on both sides who won’t leave him alone.

And Dean can’t stay. That’s been the problem from the beginning. There are unexplained homicides in Eugene, Oregon and demon sightings in Taos, New Mexico. The world is still filled with monsters under the bed and Dean and Sam have to keep going. Too many lives are at stake.

But they have the bond. Through it, Dean and Cas start over again.

It begins with a text.

\------------------------------

Cas is packing up the kitchen, trying not to get emotional over spatulas and whisks. Michael and he used to make Claire breakfast every Saturday. It was their ritual – pancakes with chocolate chips or blueberries. He can see her blonde hair bouncing as she laughs at his husband, who has somehow gotten batter on his nose. His phone chirps.

**D: Remember the ice skating rink at the mall?**

Cas pulls himself out of a Saturday morning memory and tries to find a different time. He sits at the kitchen table and rubs his thumb against the side of his iPhone. He smiles as he sees Dean with his hand out, trying to help Cas off his ass at the Overland Park Mall. He remembers the blazing smile on Dean’s face and how green his eyes are when he’s laughing. Dean’s in a black t-shirt and his leather jacket. His hands are warm even on the ice.

**C: I couldn’t stay on my feet for more than 20 seconds**

**D: You had on 3 coats and mittens. No wonder you had no balance**

**C: And you skated backwards. Such a show off**

**D: Well, when you got it, you got it**

Cas stares at the phone, not sure where to go from here. Suddenly it occurs to him that maybe Dean is in danger and he’s grasping at memories before he tells Cas he’s dying and the panic is devastating. He opens the bond and searches for Dean, but Dean’s heartbeat is steady and his head is clear. Relief floods through the link.

**D: I’m fine, baby. Easy. It’s ok**

Cas is panting before he knows it and now he’s overwhelmed. Anger, frustration and fear rip through him until he senses Dean sending him calm and peace and affection. His phone chirps again.

**D: Breathe. Just remembering good times**

**D: I miss you**

Cas stares at the phone and follows directions. He breathes in and breathes out. And then he remembers hot chocolate and a pretzel at Auntie Ann’s after falling four times on the ice and finally calling it quits. And the bruise on his ass. God, he could barely walk the next day. Cas smiles.

**D: There. That’s better**

**C: Are you in Kansas?**

**D: Washington state. Missing hikers**

**C: Safe?**

**D: Got my bodyguard Fabio**

**D: Have a good day, Cas.**

\--------------------------------------------

The next week Cas is in the office closet pulling out boxes of Claire’s old things. He’s sitting cross-legged on the floor, ignoring the time capsule that is Michael’s workspace. Files and individual papers still litter the glass and chrome desk but the stapler, tape and pen basket are lined up like toy soldiers. An empty mug that proclaims “World’s Best Step-Dad” sits on a coaster. Cas sits with his back to that portion of the room. If he can’t see it, it can’t see him, can’t peer into his soul and pick at the fragile wall he’s built to keep the mind-numbing grief away.

Cas has pulled the boxes out into the room. He opens the top one and finds a brown-and-cream-colored teddy bear that Dean won for Claire at the state fair when he came out with Sam for her 6th birthday. Without hesitating, he reaches for his phone.

**C: I found Claire Bear**

**D: No shit? Where?**

**C: Box in the closet**

**D: She didn’t take it to college? I’m crushed**

Cas laughs. Claire took new everything to college – new bed set, new rug, new desk chair and lamp, new computer, new Panic! At the Disco poster. No old teddy bears.

**C: Well I’m keeping it**

**D: Good**

**C: Still in Washington?**

**D: Back in Kansas. Trash day. Gotta put the cans out : )**

He smiles. Just for fun and to lighten the mood, Cas tries something new.

**C: Miss you, Alpha ; )**

There’s a pause and Cas wonders if he overstepped a boundary or got too familiar. They haven’t really talked about the fact that their connection is bigger than the bond – they’re mates for life now.

**D: Miss u 2, baby. Have a good day**

The next night Cas pads through the mostly packed, dark penthouse and stops in front of the refrigerator. He’s ready to grab a bottle of water when he’s overcome by a wave of loneliness. He spots the dining room table and remembers family dinners and parties with friends. Now he’s alone. Claire is off on her own and his rock of a husband is gone. Their family home is cold and empty. It’s selfish and it’s narcissistic, but he can’t help himself as he opens the bond and reaches out to Dean.

Dean’s there in an instant. He’s sending comfort and love and it’s a long distance hug that Cas smiles through. He sends gratitude back and takes a deep breath to compose himself. He knows that it will take a long time to get over Michael’s death, and that grief is very personal. Although he long ago came to terms with the fact that he has loved two men for the last 14 years, it almost doesn’t seem fair that he has Dean to make it easier to let Michael go. There’s a sizeable piece of him that believes he should suffer more to better honor Michael’s memory.

Cas reaches for his phone to send a “thank you” text when a reminder flashes across his screen. It stops him in his tracks and sends his pulse racing. The phone buzzes in his hand and he almost drops it. There’s a text from Dean.

**D: What just happened?**

**C: Dean, my heat’s next week**

There’s a bit of a pause as they both contemplate what that means. Bonded mates are biologically compelled to fuck like bunnies during heats and ruts. Cas’ heats come every 90 days like clockwork. Dean’s ruts are mid-April without fail. It’s asking a lot, he knows, because he’ll need Dean for five days and without him, Cas will be, well it will be hard (no pun intended) to say the least. He can get through it, of course. A heat without his mate will be very difficult -- longer, heat waves stronger, more frustrating – because the bond tells his body that he has a mate and that mate should be filling him with seed and getting him pregnant. Another pup’s not on the table and hasn’t been for years, but Cas’ body doesn’t care. Regardless, going it alone isn’t going to kill him.

**D: Your place or mine?**

\--------------------------------------

Sunday Cas goes grocery shopping for the week. He’s loading up on electrolyte drinks, protein bars, fruit, crackers and chicken breasts. He knows what his body can keep down and what he needs to keep going. Dean’s another story, though, so he’s going for carbs and red meat. He grabs a frozen lasagna, a pound of bacon and two dozen eggs. There’s a bag of frozen tater tots and hamburger buns in the cart as well. He’s trying to find the least offensive hot dogs when his phone goes off.

**D: Can you pick up yogurt and granola?**

Cas stares at the phone.

**C: Sam?**

**D: You want Sam? Thought you needed your mate, not a 3some**

Cas’ cheeks turn bright red.

**C: Since when do you eat yogurt and granola, Dean?**

**D: Since I’ve been researching how not to have a coronary while servicing a horny Omega for five days. I’m not 20 anymore**

**C: Servicing?!**

**D: My dick is yours, sweetheart ; )**

**C: *rolls eyes***

**C: Want me to throw back the tater tots & hot dogs**

**D: No**

**D: But yes**

**C: Bacon?**

**D: I love you ; )**

**C: Lasagna?**

**D: Marry me ; )**

**C: Tofu?**

**D: The party you are trying to reach…**

Cas laughs out loud.

**C: See you at the house at 7 tomorrow, right?**

**D: Yup. I’ve been doing my special exercises…**

**C: See you soon Alpha ; )**

**D: See you tomorrow, Cas <3**

\---------------------------------------------

By 4:00 pm Monday, Cas is in the thinnest boxers he has under a ceiling fan in the master bedroom, unable to cool himself down. This is normal though, how this usually goes, but by this point he and Michael are usually two orgasms in and taking a break. Dean’s still outside Indianapolis, which means Cas has three more hours of spiked temperatures, raging hormones, an erection that is as hard as a rock, and an aching emptiness he is unsuccessfully willing himself to ignore.

Sam Smith plays on a loop through the Bluetooth speaker on his nightstand and all of the ice cream is gone. He’s changing out slick pads every 30 minutes but at least he won’t have to throw out the mattress. He’s jacked off twice since lunch but that’s not what his body is interested in so it leaves him more frustrated than satisfied; dicks are kind of extraneous when you’re an Omega in heat. He’s going to try and stay like this for as long as possible but the bath tub is the next stop.

At 6:45 pm the cool tub is better but his skin feels like it’s pulled taut across his body and he’s one huge ball of aggravated nerve endings. The heat is internal, it’s a fire inside that can only be quenched by, well, another fire inside or basically his Alpha knotting him and shooting hot semen into his body. It’s been a long time since he’s had sex with his mate – months since he and Michael made love because Michael had been long gone, Cas now realizes, and a decade and a half since he and Dean were last together apart from that night. Resting his head against the cold porcelain, Cas closes his eyes and eases back to the feeling of Dean inside him, thick and insistent, taking his breath away. Perhaps _he_ should be doing special exercises, he thinks with a snort.

Then he’s clenching, every muscle inside contracting and the ache is back. He’s immediately burning up as slick trickles out of him. He’s panting, trying to remember how to breathe, as he slides two fingers into his ass and massages against the wall of muscle like Dean’s knot will soon. He’s got to get here soon, right? Cas whines and pushes back against his hand. This isn’t enough. He snarls in the back of his throat and pulls his hand away. He’s got a toy somewhere. Where is it? He bought it when Michael was gone on a business trip four years ago. Cas surges out of the tub, dripping water onto the tile floor as he stumbles back into his bedroom.

He stops just inside the doorway, distracted for a second by the fact that he can only scent himself in here now. It shouldn’t smell like this. It should smell like Michael, like _them_ together. And it should smell like satisfied Omega and mates. Suddenly it’s not just the unbearable need for sex and the drive to breed – the reason for the heat makes so much more sense. He needs to connect with his mate physically and emotionally and strengthen the bond. The hole that needs to be filled is in his goddamn heart. It’s in his soul. Cas is on his knees on the floor panting against the side of his bed when the emptiness incapacitates him. His eyes roll as his head drops back, baring his neck for no one, and the mournful howl that rips from him rings out through the penthouse and into the bond.


	5. Chapter 5

The second Dean steps through the front door he is assaulted by the smell of his mate in heat. Cas’ normal scent is ratcheted up to 11 and Dean could swear it hangs heavily in the house like a fog. He vaguely remembers Cas’ scent being stronger during previous heats but now that he’s _mated_ to him, that amazing, intoxicating smell has snaked up Dean’s nose and is screaming at his brain to find the man behind it and do some unspeakable yet very pleasurable things to him.

Unfortunately, that emotion is at complete odds with the utter heart-breaking pain that radiates through the bond. Suddenly Cas howls from the back bedroom and Dean’s blood runs ice cold. He’s stunned by the agony and isolation Cas so clearly pours into the gut-wrenching cry.

Dean is quite literally frozen to the spot, his body twisted at the conflicting “Mate, Fuck, Claim, Own,” and “Soothe, Care, Help, Love” messages that crowd into his head. He’s never experienced anything like this. On a cellular level he must care for his mate. Then, in a moment of clarity, Dean realizes that these are not conflicting sentiments at all because the best way he can care and soothe and love Cas is by showing him that he is not alone – will never be alone – that he is completely owned and that Dean’s claim is forever on his body and soul. Dean drops his bag and jogs down the hall, stopping in the bedroom doorway.

“Shit,” he whispers to himself, and damn if his traitorous dick doesn’t immediately start fattening up at the sight of _his_ naked Omega, skin still damp from a shower or something, on the floor leaning against the bed and panting, his body rosy colored from the fever and his mating bite exposed to the room. At 38 years old, Cas is still the most gorgeous thing Dean has ever seen – long and lean; lightly tanned skin; defined muscles in his thighs, abdomen and arms; messy dark hair; and vivid blue eyes. He needs to touch Cas right the fuck now.

“Cas!”

Tears stream down Cas’ cheeks and his body shakes.

“Cas! Hey, baby, stop. I’m here.”

The second Dean’s hands are on his body, Cas shocks back into awareness. Dean scoops him up and sets him down on the bed. For a second Dean’s startled as Cas sends “ _wrong mate,”_ through the bond, immediately followed by grief and shame and a thousand apologies. He brushes the hair from Cas’ forehead, realizing that Cas is experiencing so much right now. He smiles, forgiveness written all over his face, and then pulls Cas’ head to his neck so Cas can scent him fully, let the pheromones hit his brain and strengthen their connection, while Dean struggles to get out of his jacket and kicks off his shoes.

“I hurt everywhere, Dean,” Cas groans, his voice deep and breaking.

“I know, baby. I know.” Dean’s strong hands scent mark Cas’ skin. It’s good but they both need more. He’s unbuttoning and pulling at Dean’s clothes, desperate for more contact.

“It hurts _here_ ,” and Cas pulls Dean’s hands to his own chest, right above his heart. “Please. I can’t do this anymore. I can’t be alone like this. It hurts too much.”

“Shh,” Dean soothes. He leans his forehead against his mate’s as he finally frees himself of his shirts and gathers Cas up close, pressing their chests together. The relief is immediate and the intense panic and pain that’s been crowding the room starts to dissipate. “Cas you’re not alone. You’re mine, understand? Always and forever, you’re mine,” Dean realizes objectively that he’s rambling but Cas is nodding and holding onto Dean tight enough to leave white marks on his skin. “You’re my mate,” Dean continues, struggling out of his pants and boxer briefs. “I love you.” He sucks in a deep breath and Cas’ scent hits him so hard he can’t stop the growl that forms at the back of his throat. He feels Cas gasp and smells the slick that leaks from his mate. “Fuck!” he swears, warring with himself before giving in to his instincts. “Baby, I’ve got to be inside you, like 20 minutes ago.”

“Please, Dean,” Cas says, his deep voice a mixture of need and thankfulness. He swallows thickly. “Please, Alpha,” he whispers.

Dean is rock hard in an instant. He stops having a conscious thought and watches himself effortlessly flip Cas to his hands and knees and firmly push the Omega’s chest down to the bed. Cas goes easily, sighing in response, as if he’s been waiting for Dean to do exactly this because it’s what he wants, what he knows will finally give him the relief he needs.

“Submit,” Dean rumbles, and Cas goes almost boneless, slick dribbling from his ass. Dean runs his hands up Cas’ back in a soothing gesture as he rubs his cock through the absolute mess that glistens around and on Cas’ hole. They moan in unison.

Dean feels Cas panting but knows he’s calm, centered in his anticipation. Dean slowly eases in and Cas’ body willingly allows it, the heat making him pliant so he can accept his mate. “Ohhhh,” Cas breathes out, and the sound convinces Dean that he was right, that Cas now feels their connection more deeply than words alone can convey. Dean feels it too, feels Cas’ pleasure at being completely filled, at Dean being a part of him. And Dean’s entire being knows it is now home, exactly where it needs to be. Dean is giving Cas what only he can provide and his brain explodes, overwhelming happiness and pleasure cascading down his spine. He watches the goosebumps erupt on Cas’ back as he subconsciously relaxes his head and exposes his neck, showing Dean how much he trusts him.

It is absolutely amazing. And then Dean moves, rocking back and forward, and Cas comes alive.

“Dean!” he gasps, “Oh God, Dean! Please!”

Smiling, Dean picks up the pace and proceeds to take Cas apart. In fact, Dean effortlessly brings up the mental map he made of Cas’ body all those years ago, shifting his hips to drag his cock against his man’s prostate. He’s rewarded with moans and the heady smell of arousal. Hands rub up and down Cas’ back, the additional pressure grounding him. The Alpha glances down at his mate, whose head is turned, his cheek flat against the bed. Dean grins at the emotions that play out on that handsome face. Every twitch of Cas’ eyebrows, the way his nostril flares and a smile flashes or his jaw drops slightly in response to the magic Dean is working inside him, fills Dean with joy. Cas breathes heavily, small moans escaping as his eyelids droop and he relaxes further into sensation.

“There you go,” Dean praises. “Let go, baby and let me do this for you.” His hands firmly grip Cas’ hips and he’s more accurately using Cas’ body to fuck himself than actively thrusting into Cas. Cas doesn’t have to think about a thing, just let Dean manhandle him and move him, knowing Dean will without a doubt get him where he needs to be. Then Dean wraps one arm around Cas’ waist to continue the motion while reaching around to stroke Cas’ dick with his other hand. He’s rewarded with a full body shudder and the Omega’s eyes closing in pleasure.

“Not…going to last…Dean,” he pants. Dean picks up the pace as his knot forms. Cas is close now, unable to stop a string of “oh” sounds that get louder and more insistent. They morph into “Dean” as his mate pushes deeper and harder, desperate to get his knot past Cas’ rim. Cas tenses and raises up on his elbows then comes hard, shooting onto his comforter as he throws his head back and howls, this time in complete pleasure. Dean gasps as Cas clamps down on the huge cock inside his body and in the second that Cas releases him he thrusts in hard, his knot catching and locking them together. He lets out a strangled cry as he spills heavily inside Cas, coating his walls with cum.

They stay like that as Dean catches his breath and Cas floats back down to earth, his skin no longer burning hot to the touch. Love and satisfaction permeate the room as they settle in a spooning position that lets Dean graze Cas’ mating bite with his lips.

“Hello, Dean,” Cas says softly.

Dean chuckles. “Heya, Cas,” he answers. “Shit, I never even kissed you. I’m sorry.”

Cas yawns, “The kiss was implied.” He sighs. “Will you kiss me before you do that exact same thing to me in about an hour and a half?”

“Absolutely,” Dean grins, and kisses Cas’ back.

“I’m glad you’re here.”

“I wouldn’t be anywhere else, babe.”

\----------------------------------------------

“What is that amazing smell?” Dean asks, hand scratching the back of his head as he walks over to Cas. Morning sun pours in from the bank of windows in the living room, throwing a warm light over the cream-colored couch, farmhouse table and chairs, and pajama bottom-clad Omega currently conducting a symphony over the professional grade stove in the kitchen.

“Bacon,” Cas laughs, shaking his head. Dean stands behind him, resting his chin on Cas’ shoulder as he watches Cas flip pancakes. “Of course you’re probably more interested in the yogurt and granola. They’re already on the table, Dean.”

Dean chuckles against Cas’ back and it’s the most comforting sensation Cas has experienced in a long while.

“I was actually referring to the hot piece of ass flipping my pancakes,” Dean replies, giving said ass a smack.

“I think you’re the ass in this equation,” Cas fires back. He turns off the heat before twisting around to wrap his arms around his mate, nuzzling into his neck. Dean rumbles contently in response, his hand gently resting on the back of Cas’ head. They stand together for a few minutes, enjoying the closeness and shared affection without the intense need that will be rearing its not-so-ugly head in an hour or two.

Then Cas’ hands are holding Dean’s face steady as their lips meet and Dean is 19 years younger in an instant. “Can’t kiss you when you’re smiling,” Cas mumbles, and Dean laughs into his mate’s mouth.

“I love you, you dork,” Dean chides, but then leans back into the kiss, opening for Cas’ inquisitive tongue. It’s so familiar but at the same time brand new as Dean reacquaints himself with Cas’ lips and mouth. After a few seconds they break apart, both of them smiling.

“Bacon,” Cas commands.

“Bacon,” Dean agrees.

They sit at the table, chairs close and turned towards each other. Dean finishes his last bite of pancakes and sips his coffee as he looks around. Cas’ home is beautiful, views of the Dayton skyline and bright blue Ohio sky are on display through the bank of windows, becoming floor-to-ceiling murals that stretch along the entire living room. He shakes his head. “You still okay with leaving all of this?” he asks.

“Hmm?” Cas replies. “Oh, the house? Yes.”

Dean gives Cas a serious look. “All of this, Cas. I mean, you know Sam and I still travel. And the bunker has no view whatsoever. You’re gonna be giving up a lot.”

The puzzled look on Cas’ face only makes Dean more concerned. “Dean, I don’t want to be here anymore. I don’t belong here anymore. I belong with…”

“Me,” Dean finishes. “You belong with me.” And Dean’s nodding because that’s a true statement.

“You and Sam and Claire are my family, Dean. I don’t care if we are all living in a cave as long as we’re together.”

“Ah, I see,” Dean says, grinning. “It’s the threesome thing, isn’t it?”

“Are you serious right now?” Cas laughs. “You know what, I take it back. You’re right, _Alpha_. I need to be the creamy filling in a Winchester Oreo cookie.”

Dean barks out a laugh and reaches for Cas, pulling his mate onto his lap. “You know I’m going to tell him what you just said,” Dean threatens playfully and Cas is momentarily struck dumb.

“No, Dean,” he says, laughing nervously.

“Yes, Cas,” Dean teases back. “’Winchester Oreo cookie,’ huh?”

“That will make him uncomfortable, Dean,” Cas protests. He squirms in Dean’s arms. “I’m going to be living with you both. I don’t want there to be any reason for anyone to be uncomfortable.”

“Yes, my little ‘creamy filling,’” Dean jokes back. He rocks his hips up at Cas, and just that little bit of stimulation is all Cas’ body needs to remind him that there’s a reason Dean is here, eating his bacon and teasing him. Every muscle from Cas’ waist to his knees clenches and he grabs at Dean’s shoulders, squeezing hard enough to leave small bruises. Slick dampens his pants and his skin is immediately scorching hot. His scent blooms and Dean’s eyes go wide.

“Fuck,” Cas grits out.

“Right the hell now,” Dean agrees. Then Cas shouts as he’s tossed over Dean’s shoulder.

“Neanderthal!” Cas yells, smacking Dean’s back before grasping onto his waist.

Dean grunts loudly for effect and then lets out a proud howl as he tosses his mate back onto the bed.

\-----------------------------------------------

Cas stretches out an arm against the cool sheets as he rolls onto his stomach. He wakes a bit more, anxiety starting to bubble up, until he vaguely hears the TV on in the living room and determines that Dean’s still here.

_Of course Dean’s still here_ , he thinks, pulling a pillow close to his chest. Dean’s been “here” for 20 years, never abandoning him or Claire even when Cas chose another man to share his life. Yes, it was at Dean’s insistence. Yes, it was the best decision for Claire. But Cas can hardly imagine the pain Dean’s lived through all this time as he sacrificed his own happiness for Cas’ and Claire’s sake. Dean should hate him for allowing Michael to mate him. Dean should hate him for allowing Michael to touch him and help raise their child. For a moment he hates himself for it. That emotion flashes into the bond and within seconds the TV is silent.

Cas sighs before realizing, not for the first time, that he has always been Dean’s and Dean has always been his. _It’s unbelievable_ , he reflects, _that this is actually happening, that I get a second chance_. They’re both older, wiser, forever connected not only through the amazing person they’ve created and nurtured but now also through the mating bond that they should have shared so long ago. But Dean’s life has always been filled with danger, which would have placed Cas’ life in danger and put Claire at risk.

His life is now in danger.

Blue eyes blink open and he senses Dean in the doorway. Cas rolls to his back and watches Dean approach and then sit on the side of the bed. The alpha’s shoulders rise and fall as he takes a deep breath before turning to face him. Dean reaches out a hand and cups his face, and Cas instinctively nuzzles into the warm palm.

“Will you continue to hunt, Dean?”

Dean slowly nods. “Probably not so much now that you’ll be home.”

Cas grins. He’ll be home. With Dean. Anywhere with Dean is home.

“And Claire…” Dean adds.

Cas holds his gaze. Now that they’re mated, if one of them dies, the other dies. If they both die Claire will be orphaned. She’s still officially a teenager; she needs parents in her life. Of course, she’ll always have Sam, but Sam shouldn’t have to carry that responsibility. He would without hesitation but he shouldn’t have to.

“I’m sorry, Dean,” Cas starts, but Dean silences him with a kiss.

“Don’t be. You and Claire are my everything. Sam can kill shit just fine without me. Maybe I’ll move into more of a consulting role.”

They smile at each other. It really is a second chance, not just in their relationship but for each of them to be something different, to redefine and remake themselves.

“I’ve always wanted to keep bees,” Cas says.

“What?”

“Bees, Dean. Honey? I could never do that in a high-rise apartment in the city. There’s room at the bunker, right? I believe you or Sam told me about all of the land behind…”

Dean kisses him again, this time scooting onto the bed and laying on top of him, settling between his legs. A strong hand is back, thumb gently stroking his cheek as Dean’s lips brush kisses lightly across his face. The intense love he feels for Dean right now makes his breath hitch in his chest. Every nerve ending sparks as he feels the heat from Dean’s body against his. He can’t ever remember feeling like this, even when they were young and could barely keep their hands off each other. This is a bone-deep connection. Cas decides in an instant that he can never live without it.

But Dean is giving up so much, such a big part of who he is. “What about you, Dean?” he whispers.

“Shh,” Dean replies.

Cas closes his eyes as his mate kisses along his jaw and down his neck before licking their mating mark, which sends goosebumps down Cas’ arms. He feels as much as hears a happy rumbling against his chest, then tries his best to ignore a flash of embarrassment as his ass gets damp in response. His pulse quickens as Dean continues to lavish attention to every square inch of available skin, reverently depositing licks and kisses to collarbones, nipples, and ticklish ribs. Dean’s shifting weight as he slowly moves down his body pushes Cas into the mattress, grounding him in feelings of safety and reminding him again that Dean is _here_. It’s only when the heat and wet of Dean’s mouth engulfs his half-hard dick that Cas breaks the calm quiet that has settled over them like a homemade quilt.

“Dean,” he says softly, resisting the urge to place his hands on Dean’s head and instead running strong fingers along the back of his mate’s shoulders.

It’s a hypnotizing motion, Dean sliding his mouth up and down Cas’ length. He feels Dean’s tongue explore the slit at the top before sliding down to his base and swallowing around him, mimicking what he imagines Dean must feel when they’re locked together. He can’t think of the last time Michael did this; the Alpha never enjoyed it and Cas never pushed him. But it feels so right, right now – so intimate and so giving – that he can’t keep from looking down to watch in fascination as his glistening cock disappears and reappears between Dean’s lips.

“Fuck,” he pants, willing himself not to close his eyes so he doesn’t miss any of this. “Your mouth, Dean. Oh my God. I don’t…it’s…” Then somehow there’s a hand massaging his balls, adding another layer of stimulation, and he moans loudly as his hips instinctively buck up into Dean’s mouth. His ass is leaking he’s so aroused and Dean hums around him as he gets a fresh nose-full of Cas’ scent. Dean slowly bobs at his tip before sliding down, and Cas finally gives in, closing his eyes and just experiencing the drag of Dean’s tongue. When Dean does it again but simultaneously slips two fingers into him, Cas arches off the bed and grabs onto the back of Dean’s neck. Something between a growl and a groan escapes him and then Dean strokes his prostate and Cas literally screams.

“Dean!” he can’t help it, he’s fucking into his mate’s mouth. “Gonna come, Dean! Gonna…Ah!” he cries out. Dean grabs his hip with a free hand and swallows as Cas fills Dean’s mouth with cum. The bastard’s still rubbing that spot gently to milk as much as he can from Cas’ body, which twitches involuntarily. Cas slumps back into the bed as Dean disengages himself, smiling smugly and filling the bedroom with Alpha satisfaction.

“Gonna fuck you now, sweetheart,” he says in a low growl, and Cas can barely nod his head before he registers that his knees are next to his ears and his mate is pushing that glorious, big cock of his deep into Cas’ ass.

“So good, Dean. Shit, you feel so good!” he babbles. He wishes he could be more proactive but he’s not sure his body will follow simple instructions at this point. He decides that verbal encouragement may be just as exciting. “Harder, Dean. Please. As deep as you can…Shit!” Dean is very good at following instructions, slipping his hands under Cas to spread his cheeks and make even more room as he thrusts forcefully into Cas’ hole. “Just like that, just like that,” he chants.

Every nerve ending in Cas’ body is singing, vibrating like a tuning fork that’s picking up Dean’s frequency and amplifying it, as Dean spends what might be hours fucking into him. Regardless, his eyes go wide as his dick fills again, looking at Dean in wonder. When Dean figures it out, an open-mouth grin lights up his face and he scoots even further into Cas.

“Oh baby, gonna come so deep inside you,” Dean promises. His knot is forming but he doesn’t want this to ever end. He groans in frustration but he’s a slave to his biology. His hands shoot to Cas’ waist as he pulls the Omega into each thrust, burying himself as deep as he can. His knot fully engorges and catches on what is his final thrust, causing him to instinctively throw his head back and howl as he shoots semen deep into his mate. Dean thinks his ears must be ringing until he feels Cas’ hot cum on his belly and realizes Cas is howling with him.

They collapse in a heap, linked together and euphoric. Cas strokes Dean’s face as they pant and smile at each other.

“If that doesn’t knock you up, Cas, nothing I do will!” Dean laughs.

“Jesus, Dean! Don’t even say that out loud,” Cas chuckles in return.

Dean leans over and kisses his mate’s forehead. “Love you.”

“Love you more,” Cas replies.

“I don’t even think that’s possible, babe,” Dean insists. Cas is too tired to argue, but he’s sure he should.


	6. Chapter 6

They make love several more times over the course of three and a half days.

They fuck considerably more often than that.

Dean fucks Cas in the kitchen, bent over the farmhouse table. He turns Cas to the windows in the middle of the day and fucks his mate in front of downtown Dayton, jacking Cas off until white shoots onto the glass. When Dean lifts Cas up off the bed, the Omega’s legs wrapped around his waist, and fucks him against the wall until he comes nearly screaming Dean’s name, Dean’s confident there will finally be a knock on the penthouse door.

They exchange blow jobs in the shower. Cas has a particularly intense orgasm with Dean’s tongue buried up his ass. They recreate their first time in the Impala with Cas’ back against the king bed’s padded headboard and Dean kneeling in front of him, fucking up into him, slow and sweet.

Friday night Cas make them hot dogs and ramen noodles. They sit on the white shag rug on the living room floor, looking out at the city lights, and talk about next steps and selling the penthouse. Then for the last time during his heat, Cas feels that clench and fevered flush, crawls onto Dean’s lap, eases himself down onto his Alpha’s dick and slowly rides him as they kiss. Dean wraps his strong arms around Cas and lets the love of his life use him however he wants. Cas comes with a groan but it’s the lovely, tired and completely satisfied sigh he makes when Dean’s knot easily slides into place and Dean comes into Cas’ body that steals Dean’s heart.

\---------------------------------

“Come back with me,” Dean offers. “Just pack a suitcase, Cas, get in the car, and come back with me.”

He sees the wheels in his mate’s mind turn, evaluating the feasibility of the request, so Dean stretches a hand across the table and taps it twice with his index finger. “We’ll straighten everything up so it’s ready to show, plug in some air fresheners, and call the realtor on our way out. They do everything with electronic signatures these days. At least that’s what Sam says.”

Cas smiles that little half smile that means he’s pleased with an idea.

“It’s not like you can’t come back here as often as you need to. Just come with me now. I want you with me.”

That comment earns Dean the gummy, eye-crinkling smile he was hoping for. Cas stretches a hand out to cover Dean’s.

“Sam won’t mind?”

Dean rolls his eyes. “Are you serious, dude? Sam can’t wait to see you so you guys can nerd out over all the crazy lore books we have in the library. Plus I texted him about the bee-keeping thing and he has a ton of questions for you about it.”

Cas nods his head. “Yes. Dean, I’d like to come back with you. We need to tell Claire.”

“Let’s tell her over lunch.”

Lunch consists of burgers and homemade potato chips at Blind Bob’s next to Wright State. Claire’s munching on a basket of fried pickles with her nose stuck in a biology book when they walk in. She glances up and smiles when she spots their joined hands, greeting them with a smirk that Dean remembers from years ago.

“You two look sufficiently exhausted and happy,” she quips. “Most of my friends would probably be barfing right now but I’m happy for you guys.”

“Well thank you, sweetie,” Dean chuckles as he leans over to give her a hug. “Glad Dad and I don’t make you barf.”

The two men slide into the bench seat across from their daughter. Cas snags a fried pickle spear, which earns him a raised eyebrow. “Claire, I am starving right now. Spare your father a fried pickle.”

She shakes her head and pushes the basket in front of Cas, mumbling something about TMI. They order lunch but Claire sits back and crosses her arms, squinting at her parents. “You’re holding hands under the table, aren’t you?”

Dean places his and Cas’ hands, fingers laced, on the table for inspection. “Claire, I know this is a lot to process. Are you okay with this?” he asks, genuinely concerned. Claire recently lost a major father figure. She would have every right to resent the fact that Dean was now very much in the picture after only being a part-time presence for so long.

The corner of her mouth twitches as she looks from Cas to Dean, but her shoulders relax a little. “Yea, Pops, I’m fine. I mean, I miss him. A lot. He was my dad, you know? But that doesn’t mean that I’m mad that you guys are together. I want you to be happy. I want you to be together.”

“Thanks, honey,” Cas says softly. “That’s important to me. To us,” he adds, glancing at Dean. “Claire, the penthouse is going on the market very soon and Pops has asked me to go back to Lawrence with him.” He pauses, breathing deeply. “I’m going to go. I’m actually really happy about it,” he adds, a smile sneaking across his face.

“Uh, yea, of course you should be in Lawrence. I mean you guys are mates now. I don’t know how you’ve been apart this long. Like, doesn’t it hurt, being away from each other?”

The breath Dean didn’t know he was holding leaves him in a relieved rush. “Yea, sweetie, it does. And I don’t want Dad hurting any more. Plus Uncle Sam and Dad are great friends, so they’ll be able to hang out now and do nerdy, bee-keeping things together.”

“What?”

“Never mind,” Cas says. “What Pops is saying is that I won’t be so alone. And you’re right, it actually hurts a lot to be away from him. But Claire, this impacts you as well. Certainly, you’ll come to Lawrence on breaks and for the holidays, and we can Skype every day if you want.” His worry spills into the booth. “I’m not leaving you, honey. You can call me and I’ll have you on a plane to Kansas City any time you like, even for a weekend. Especially for a weekend. Not just special occasions. And we’ll come visit you too…”

“Dad,” Claire interrupts, “it’s okay. I get it. You’re not abandoning me. I’m a big girl now. Living in a dorm already.”

 _She’s right_ , Cas thinks. _She’s a big girl, already living on her own_. “Yes, but I want you to know that I will absolutely understand if you want to check in on me at least once a week to make sure I’m adjusting to…Kansas and want to come visit me so you can see for yourself that I’m doing okay.”

Claire snorts from across the table and rolls her eyes. “God, Dad, you’re so transparent.” They smile at each other, and then Claire kicks Dean under the table.

“Hey!” he yelps.

“If you don’t treat Dad right I will not hesitate to drive to Lawrence and kick your ass, Pops.”

“Did you just threaten your own father?” Dean asks, melodramatically waiving his hands around and grinning.

Claire hides a smile and silently points a finger at Dean, raising her eyebrows, and then pretends to shoot him.

“Love you, Claire,” Dean says, raising his hands in surrender.

“Are you heading out today?” she asks.

“Yes,” Cas answers. “We just have one stop to make.”

\---------------------------------------

Woodland Cemetery is breathtakingly beautiful. Two hundred acres of tall trees and rolling hills create a peaceful setting that immediately settles in Cas’ soul. The late-day sun streams between the branches of century-old poplars, oaks and willows. It’s historic, absolutely unique, and now lovingly watches over Cas’ fallen husband.

Michael was a family man. He gave Cas and Claire the best he possibly could. He was a loving husband and step-father. Cas is forever grateful for him. He hopes that Michael knew that. At least Cas tried every day to make sure Michael felt the love and appreciation he held for his mate.

Cas drops Dean’s hand and steps forward to squat next to the stone flush marker that now serves as the eternal placeholder for this wonderful man. He runs his fingers over the carved stone, ignoring the tears that fall as he tries not to imagine that Michael’s life has been reduced to the tiny tablet with its brief inscription.

“Thank you,” he whispers, “for everything you did for us and everything you were. You didn’t deserve what happened to you and I’m so sorry. You were an exceptional man, Michael. I miss you.” Cas sniffs and quietly wipes his eyes, then forces a smile as he senses Dean standing beside him.

“I used to call him ‘Mr. Disneyland’ cause he was just the nicest guy. Plus Claire always talked about that trip to Disneyland that you all went on,” Dean says. He sighs. “I couldn’t have picked a better mate for you, Cas. I’m damn glad he was there for you guys. Michael, if you’re listening, I am really sorry that I had to be the one…” He swallows hard. “I would give anything to have been able to save you, man. But I promise, you are a hero in my book. Seriously. I always counted you as a friend.”

Cas stands and wraps his arms around Dean’s waist, breathing deeply. The sadness is there, but he knows now that it won’t break him. Dean gives his shoulders a squeeze.

“We can stay as long as you like, Cas. Wanna sit down?”

Cas’ blue eyes scan the setting. He wants to add this to the memories that he has of Michael, this serene and natural space that stands guard over its charges as it has for over a century and a half. He breathes in, scenting sweet grass and hearing the wind rustling through the leaves overhead.

“No. I’m ready, Dean,” he says, looking into his mate’s green eyes. They share a small smile.

“Let’s go.”


End file.
